i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
