Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
