it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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