We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Randomize
