I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
