I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
