he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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