I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
