we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
