I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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