So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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