Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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