Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize