I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
