I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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