it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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