is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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