Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Randomize
