I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
