if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
