dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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