Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
