it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
