Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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