His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
im having a threesome with these popsicles
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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