is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
