I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I will be naked everywhere
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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