I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
