Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
