Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
