I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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