People with herpes should wear stickers.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
