Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
