sarcasm needs its own font
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He's a Shit stain on my heart
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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