I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
