I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
