Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
