We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
