Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
