Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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