But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
