someone get that fucking seahorse.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
