You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
