Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
