i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
