i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just gift wrapped bread.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
