Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Randomize
