she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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