Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
