So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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